People who equate truth with fact are missing the point.

On the Eighth Day

And on the seventh day God ended His work which He had done, and He rested on the seventh day from all His work which He had done.

Then God blessed the seventh day and sanctified it, because in it He rested from all His work which God had created and made.

And God . . . → Read More: On the Eighth Day

Cursing and Swearing: The Carter Method

All week last week, Carter was home sick with some kind of respiratory nastiness.

The lovely thing about asthma is, as unpleasant as a cold is for anyone, for him it’s compounded. Not only does he get sicker, but he has to get on his nebulizer every four hours around the clock. Also? Steroids.

. . . → Read More: Cursing and Swearing: The Carter Method

Loot

My rampage of over-thorough household organization continues, and finally, the kitchen is finished. During my quest to¬†quell¬†every last whisk’s desire for anarchy and every saucepan’s tendency toward insubordination, I found this:

So me? I was all excited, like so: Ooooh, I can make something! It will be vegetables that . . . → Read More: Loot

Super Secret Phone Wizardry

I hate buying groceries.

I know. You’re probably surprised.

Heh.

Alas, it eventually has to be done. By yesterday, my pantry looked like this:

That isn’t the pantry of a family that is in any danger of going hungry, but Brian told me that if I tried to feed him one . . . → Read More: Super Secret Phone Wizardry

Overcorrection

Jacob is taking drivers’ education.

Oh, you’re sweet. Yes, I was very young when he was born.

Jacob is doing great with the whole learn-to-move-3,000-pounds-of-metal-down-the-road thing. I, on the other hand, had a hard time.

Let’s look first at what I had to work with.

In my case, the family truckster . . . → Read More: Overcorrection

Tattle Tale

I took Brian to the doctor today.

Why? “I want you to keep me company,” says he, “and besides, I never remember what they tell me.”

Indeed, his memory is poor. Otherwise? He would know that I cannot resist my impulses to taunt, mock, tattle, tease, and in general be a giant pain-in-the-ass.

Seriously, . . . → Read More: Tattle Tale

Random Pee-er

Pssst…come close…a little closer. That’s good. Now listen carefully because I’m going to whisper this next part; you know how I hate to tempt the universe.

Things are good here. Like, freaky good. Awesome, even. All is quiet and lovely and about as peaceful as things have been in a year and a half.

. . . → Read More: Random Pee-er

My Very First Recipe and Cooking Post!

Brian was watching Roseanne last night while I sat next to him, writing a grocery list. One of the kids on the show was yelling about needing something for a bake sale and Dan (He was the dad, for those of you who were living under a rock or wearing diapers in the 80s.) . . . → Read More: My Very First Recipe and Cooking Post!

Nether Regions

Nether regions are what most people would call private parts, except that we think calling them private parts is stupid. They are nether: south of the belly button.

“Carter, don’t forget to wash your nethers before you get out of the bath!”

“My nethers are all itchy. I hope I’m not getting a yeast . . . → Read More: Nether Regions

In the Olden Days

When I was a little girl, I loved to ask my mom, “What was it like when you were a little girl in the olden days?”

And I was sort of kidding because I did, in fact, know that the 1950s were not the olden days, but I did love to hear how life . . . → Read More: In the Olden Days

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