 I remember walking up the stairs to Robert’s apartment, determined to end the hateful stalemate that was immoveable, static, a mountain or a moon, and I walked up the stairs trembling and I would end it. I would end it if I died. . . . → Read More: Darkness Is a Cannibal  I start a load of laundry, take the boy to school, pour a cup of coffee, put the dogs out, answer email. I fold a load of laundry, make some phone calls, drink another cup of coffee, sit at my desk and write a few listless words that won’t go where I want them . . . → Read More: Behind My Eyes  For context, you might want to read this first. You know what sucks about being sad? Besides the sadness, I mean. It’s the all-consumingness of the thing. (Spell checker doesn’t care much for the word consumingness, to which I say get over yourself, spell checker! I have bigger problems than you!) No, what really . . . → Read More: Withouting  Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 3.1 (except it’s less of a part and more of an interlude) We all grow up with rules. I’m not talking about the regular rules that our parents speak aloud – no running in the house; don’t sing at the dinner table; if you wear your tap . . . → Read More: The Ugly Familiar 4: Give Yourself Away My eldest son, Jacob, played his first solo show last Friday. My husband and I took the rest of the kids to hear him and we had a nice time, or as nice a time as any 40-something adults can have in a large crowd of teenagers. There is deep joy in watching our . . . → Read More: Proud/Sad I was doing pretty good. No, really. I was. Not great; after a many-months long depression, I wouldn’t expect to bounce back to some kind of happy-chirpy version of myself. No only would that be unrealistic, but everyone who knows me would be bug-eyed with confusion and amazement, so that sounds a little freaky. . . . → Read More: Grief Is an Emotional Tsunami and Integrity Sucks but Being Syndicated at BlogHer Is Pretty Cool so I’m Calling Today a Wash You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. —Buddha I began with the hypothesis that exposing . . . → Read More: Now We’re Back To the Beginning At 11:32 on Wednesday night, Brian’s cell phone rang. By the time he unhooked and removed his C-PAP mask, found his pants, and dislodged the phone from one of his pockets, he had missed the call. He saw that the call had come from his parents’ house and he knew the news wouldn’t be . . . → Read More: Grief Is a Rising Tide I have that feeling tonight, the one where it seems that gravity has doubled. The urge to curl up in my nest on the couch and stare at the TV until I fall asleep is almost irresistible. So I’m here, resisting it. I’m tired of watching the days slide past me, empty of accomplishment . . . → Read More: Happier and Healthier: The Beginning Every time we get a new dog, we have the same argument. I want to wait to give the new dog a name. I figure, if we give it a few days, the dog will name itself. My family, on the other hand, is so eager to have something to call the thing (why . . . → Read More: Grieving Lessons  |
    |
|||
|
© Adrienne Elizabeth Jones 2009-2021 Thank you for visiting No Points for Style. Powered by WordPress & the Atahualpa Theme by BytesForAll. Discuss on our WP Forum |
||||
